You should be embarrassed if:
1. You hide from someone behind a door, and they find you.
2. You wave back at someone who’s not waving at you.
3. Your wife says she wants another baby, and you immediately think, “Crap, that’ll be another child support payment.”
4. You get caught watching High School Musical.
5. You make plans to see High School Musical 3 when it comes out on October 24. Yes, October 24.
6. You wolf whistle when you see Zac Efron, the feminine, bobbly little cutie.
7. You buy your cap and gown and tassel and then discover that your parents will be in the Caribbean on graduation day.
8. You accidentally reveal a secret while explaining how good you are at keeping secrets.
9. A date ditches you for a Def Leppard concert. No, actually, good riddance. I mean, Dep Leppard?
10. You can’t remember that one girl’s name, over and over and over again.
You should not be embarrassed if:
1. You don’t know what people are talking about. Just ask them.
2. You’re a Republican. It’s perfectly acceptable to be a Republican.
3. You like American Idol.
4. You’re telling the truth to a friend.
5. You love antiques and tea and lace; they’re quite lovely.
6. You’re giving your honest opinion.
7. He thought it was a date, and it was not.
8. You’re nervous. There is no shame in being nervous even though nervousness feels like it is comprised almost entirely of shame.
9. You’re not good at basketball. They can’t read as fast as you or throw a pot on a potter’s wheel.
10. Your stomach gurgles. Everyone’s does.
