Do you remember a few years ago when Sophia Coppola made Marie Antoinette? The story of a young naïf trapped in an emotionless arranged marriage? A dreamy, frosty princess movie saddled by an explicit chore—to bear a male heir? Well, if you don’t remember it, see it. And if you do remember it, you don’t need to see The Duchess.
Don’t get me wrong. Marie Antoinette is a slow, meandering movie, but it uses that daze and delirium to demonstrate Marie’s alternating bondage and frivolity. But unlike Marie Antoinette, The Duchess’ sleepy story has no drive or purpose. It’s simply sad and boring, drawn out and frustrating.
Keira Knightley stars as Georgiana, Duchess of Devonshire, a young naïf trapped in an emotionless arranged marriage saddled by an explicit chore—to bear a male heir. The Duke of Devonshire, played by an android Ralph Fiennes, is a paper thin character who spends most of his time just standin’ around or eating mutton. Even so, the Duke provides almost all of the impetus for the dreary plot, first by shunning Georgiana, then raping her, then separating her from her true love, then giving away her child, and finally by bedding her best friend. If this sounds at least exciting, it isn’t. By the end of the film, we know only one thing: the Duke is one bad dude. But what we don’t know is why. Zero history or insight is given as to why the Duke is so cruel; he’s not even cruel for cruelty’s sake. He’s simply void, selfish, petty, and powerful, and he’s evil because the story requires him to be so.
Any fan of Knightley’s would assume that after enough bullying by her husband, she would summon up some of that good ol’ Knightley pluck and fight back. Miss Swann did it; Elizabeth Bennett did it. Sadly, The Duchess does not. Like a high-strung horse, she is broken down, ultimately resigning herself to the Duke’s rein, a tack which Romola Garai took with much more depth in Daniel Deronda.
Aside from the lovely costuming and a resounding feeling of “But why?!”, there is nothing at all remarkable about The Duchess. The cinematography is so bland it could hardly be called cinematography, the score is sadly lacking despite being written by the usually brilliant period composer Rachel Portman, and the dialogue is plain and witless. Even the emotion is contrived. A point is made of the Duchess wearing elaborately beautiful wigs, and yet late in the film, in a moment of what we’re to believe is intense grief, Georgiana’s wig—not her natural hair— is disheveled and tangled. It’s as if she told her lady-in-waiting that morning to ‘give me something that says “distress and angst.”’
A lineage tells us about Georgiana’s daughter and granddaughter, but it never quite makes it’s actual point—that the Duchess was the great-great of the late Lady Diana Spencer. And so it goes with the entire film. The point is never quite made, decisions are never quite followed through on, the villain is never quite understood, and the end doesn’t come quite soon enough. If it seems like I spent a lot of time discussing other films in this review, it’s because everything in The Duchess has been done before, and been done better, in other movies. C-
The Low Down: This movie was excruciatingly boring and pointless. The fabrics were lovely. Dominic Cooper looks better without his wig on, but still has a sort of Cro-Magnon thing going on. Don’t go see this movie. But, if you do, watch out for the lines “Harryo, wahoo!” and “You can stay behind and take care of our husband” (said to the mistress!). These are the only bright spots in the movie. What to do the rest of the time? Um, popcorn? Take a book? Try that Etch-a-Sketch in the dark thing you’ve heard about? LD Grade: D
